Sincerely Not Yours 11

It’s September!!!!!

Where the heck are you?

I’ve only managed a glimpse of you driving past my house, you didn’t even see me!!!

Do you not understand that I need you!? You are a part of a process that involves my heart

(Sort of :-/)

You are depriving me of my basic essentials in life

Twice I’ve texted you, no response!!

10 DAYS later……..

Oh my!!! My dearest crush, how refreshed I feel!! After seeing you again!! Properly!! Although, the effort it took!! Gosh Darnit!!

But alas, I had my moment in the sun!!! Oh & what a moment it was!!!

That banter, the ever so delightful loving banter!!

I missed you, I just didn’t realise how much!!!! I saw your car from afar & I panicked, panicked because I thought, Not again! so close and yet so far!!! I couldn’t let it happen so I asked the boy to run & catch your attention, he ran (poor boy)!! Gosh darnit, he just missed you!! Boy panting & knackered, me disappointed, contemplating if I should knock at your door when I get to your house!!?!, but then you came out again, you must have seen us walk down, coz why else would you have come out, RIGHT??! 😛

Anyway!! I love how you always show me a glimpse of your emotions!!

This time you called our thing “The Great Romance” Wow!!! Great Romance!!!?

Never thought I would get acknowledgement of this thing I seemed to have been on my own in!! :-O, now you are in it!!

Maybe it won’t be long now till I sign off ‘Sincerely Yours…’

But for now, You remain

….and I remain

Sincerely Not Yours

greysuga

Hi 🙂

Finally I’ve seen you, talked to you AND been in very close proximity heart racing, there’s no mistaking it!!! I am deeply & absolutely…..ok, so it’s a clear problem when I have to have a mini break & debate BY myself, in my head as to whether I can attribute this to ‘deeply inlove’ or ‘deeply inlike’!!! I mean, seriously, you’ve got me so messed up, it’s insane!!!!

I thoroughly enjoy you!! That’s a new one for me, I mean, What!?!

I have enjoyed being with people (men) before but I don’t think I have ever enjoyed them!! Enjoy You, how do I define that!? Well, I enjoy my food, (such a food snob) especially M&S food, I thoroughly enjoy M&S food!…I thoroughly enjoy you!!!!

Because of you, I get new revelation on word definitions, on meanings of songs, a new understanding of words and phrases spoken by others in their moment of pure unadulterated chemical reaction to the person they are with, a reaction so often termed as ‘Love’. Never like, but ‘LOVE’

I told you I had a dream about you, you seemed rattled! I told you the dream, you got a bit calmer & thanked me. However, I didn’t tell you the other dream

I finally had you in my house, voluntarily, albeit in a dream (Lolestest!!!!). Can’t tell you that dream! Yet!! How would you react?! Gosh!!!

I am however, extremely excited & feeling accomplished!!

I have been waiting for you to finally use my number, my telephone number! You know, the one I gave you in NOVEMBER 2014!!! Gosh man!! What’s a girl to do?!!

So accomplished why? Well after months of asking & you telling me, me calling you a lier & never actually getting the call or TEXTS!! In a bid to prove you have my number, you showed me it on your phone! I made you call me to prove it!!!

Need I Say More!!….

Accomplished, heck yeah!!!

And yet I still remain….

Sincerely Not Yours

Sincerely Not Yours 8

Hi,

Happy New Year,

I haven’t written to you in a while, well, since last year!!!

I guess I wanted to see you first so as to maybe, I don’t know, validate my roller-coaster of emotions.

Perfectly timed I would suggest, it’s not exactly seeing in the New Year together but it is seeing you in the New Year!! that’s done it!!

So yeah, seeing you in the New Year, that day was special, it became my official New Year, never to be forgotten, firmly & boldly etched on my brain, body and soul, I swear there were explosions in all of my insides!! You HUGGED me, okay so it wasn’t a full on embrace but considering I’ve wanted one for a while, mmmm, and THEN, You KISSED ME  (screaming!! on the inside!!! ). Okay, Again, not a sloppy wet kiss, or on the mouth for that matter, BUT, it was sufficient , Not only that, you went into a full on song & dance to the shop security guard!!, about how much you like me, like genuinely like me and how I make you laugh!!!

Nxcaaaaaaaaw!!! Beaming!! please allow me a little time to ‘beam away’ of which I did all the way to my house!!!!

And then your car!!! I was in it!! Finally!! (giggle overload!!!!  You gave me and my son a lift with our groceries, couldn’t have felt more at home if I tried, Oh My Gosh!!!, for just a split second (hehehe!! more like 7 minutes) we were like a little family. Almost got you into the house, a few more steps, darn it,

Ah well, at least you got to the door, now you know for sure where to find me

I Dare You!!

Sincerely Not Yours

Sincerely Not Yours 7

 Hi

I heard this song today, it’s not a new song, but suddenly it had new meaning!!

I started to recall our last conversation, how I kept throwing you hints, GOSH! I even came straight out and said if you asked me to marry you, I would!!! You missed it at first, then you laughed!!

So this song…..

I don’t wanna wait in vain for your love.

From the very first time I rest my eyes on you,

My heart says follow through.

But I know, now, that I’m way down on your line,

But the waitin’ feel is fine

Lol!!! I have knocked on your door before, two years ago!! that was my first move

(Lol!!! Blushing moment) shall I knock again & make my intentions clear?!!!

My intentions being, I like, maybe love you (lmao!!!) but from afar mind, in the comfort of my fantasy world (crying on the inside, with laughter!) any louder, on the bus, I would be sectioned!!!

So the other day we met in the rain, you walked towards me saying you were not going to stand about in this rain chatting!! But you did!! You kept touching me, why do you do that?!! Then, then (mmmm, memories are made of this!!) you saved me from being hit by s bike! I suddenly wished I was in one of those movies, strategically falling into your arms like a damsel in distress (Lolestest)

Mmmm, moments to cherish

Sincerely Not Yours

Sincerely Not Yours5

 Dear You!!

What is this thing you do??!!!!

Was thinking about you, realizing I’ve not seen you for a few weeks, not even a glimpse (although I’ve given you ample opportunities to see me, even if we don’t speak!! lol!!! Strategic loitering, Lolestest!!!)

I wondered if you were missing me at all or even wondering in a small way, how I am or even thinking ‘oh, how I miss our flirtful banter’!!! Thing is, I’ll never know, it would be nice though, then at least, I could maybe, I don’t know, I could something, Gosh Darn it!!

What is this thing you do??!!! 

Right now I am marvelling at how this letter is going to end different from when I started! See when I started writing this letter I hadn’t seen you for a while but somehow, somehow thinking of you seems to summon you to me (chuckle!!)

 2 WEEKS Later….

Wow!! It’s taking longer and longer to write these letters, is it possible?! Could it be?!? Surely not!!Are you losing your effect on me??

 Or maybe, just maybe I got tired of imagining……

…..but then today, I imagined how our last conversation should have gone…

 Missed opportunities!!!

 Till we meet again my muse

 Love always

 

Sincerely Not Yours

Sincerely Not Yours4

         If it was unknown to me before, well it’s definitely known to me now!!!

I have, I can safely say, lost the plot!!!

Smiling to myself as I go along, riding on a bus to work, working really hard to not go into full fits of laughter!!

(It’s ok for me to know that I’ve lost the plot, the whole world does not need to know!!) I love that I can have a full conversation with you, with humour inserted for good measure, In Your Absence!!!

You have driven me insane!!

Yesterday was a good day, it was a joy to bump into you, in our usual spot, I didn’t even need to employ my old ways (Stalkerish tendencies) Lolestest!!!

I thought I detected a hint of jealousy when I told you that my colleagues think I should get a boyfriend, even after I quizzed you about it, all you said was it was dangerous!!

WHAT?!!!!?

Is it because you can’t quite work out what to do!?!

In a way, I’m kinda glad you are a fantasy coz reality might just disappoint.

This way I get to imagine “Me & You and You & Me, So happy together!!!”

Kkkkkk!!!!

Yes, yes, yes, I am that one!! that one who is enchanted by you, silly I know, but what’s a girl to do!!?

Sincerely Not Yours

xxx

Sincerely Not Yours3

My dearest ‘crush’

 

Hope this finds you well, yes, I know I said goodbye but in my defence, I saw you again the other day and of course now I am beaming, lol!!! Actually, I can’t stop giggling to myself by myself, AWASH!!!!!

 

Seeing you always does something to me, we part and I am left wishing, if only I could take you home with me. I imagine that waking up next to you would be amazing!!! I imagine I would always wake up in fits of giggles and laughter!!!

 

The idea that you and I could have something, that we could be an item blows my mind!! If it were possible, I would have you, nay, I would have had you long ago, so long ago it was that you captured my emotions, so long ago that I set my mind on you!! I refrain from saying ‘my heart’ for obvious reasons but perhaps, perhaps had it been another time, another place… my full unbroken heart would have been yours, all yours!!! & perhaps, your heart would have been mine!!!

 

 

It’s quite odd, in the absence of a relationship, how I get to miss you when I don’t see you and when I do see you, I try hard to not show how giddy I am!! Lolestest!!! But then, in my constant wonder and somewhat confusion or better still, my lack of knowledge and understanding of your feelings, I have noticed that in my presence, you don’t quite know what to do with yourself. You become a bungling idiot, in a special way, the way in which a person in love would act when the one they are in love with is present!!

 

Of course, this is me misreading the signs again, (I’m wrong aren’t I?)!! Aahh well, easily done!!!

 

Anyway, now that you are immortalised in my phone, half the battle is won!! Though the real thing is better, I’ll settle for an image, after all, our relationship

(I know, I know, it’s not a relationship), our relationship is image-(nary), Lolestest!!!

 

Till we meet again…

 

I…

 

Sincerely Not Yours

xxx

 

Sincerely Not Yours2

My dearest crush, 

How dare you invade my life without actually being in it!! 
Someone mentioned your name & I turned into a schoolgirl, giggling uncontrollably! Dammit!!!
I am awash with emotions that I can’t quite explain, I fear I may have fallen for you, a little more than just a ‘little (not by any stretch) crush!!!’  You are not mine, I can’t have you and yet I want to do just one thing and after that, KE SERA SERA!!!
Two years on, am even more confused about our ‘THING’ (for lack of a better description, lol!!!) Last night, I struggled to get to sleep, so amongst other things, you occupied my thoughts, so it’s no surprise then that when I finally arrived in LA-LA land, you were there waiting for me!!! Dreams hey, aren’t they just something!!!  
OK, so, I mean (SIGH, covering my eyes), OK, I LOVE YOU… NO WAIT, I, I, I, NO, THAT’S NOT POSSIBLE- already established that it cannot be ‘LOVE’, coz I am incapable of doing so, I THINK , I don’t want to either, I DON’T THINK!!! 
I can’t be in a relationship without considering (SERIOUSLY) marriage and yet, neither can I consider marriage!!!! AS far as I am aware you don’t want MARRIAGE EITHER!! RIGHT!?! WE CAN’T BE TOGEHER FOR JUST THE SAKE OF…….. You are driving me insane, BLOODY HELL MAHN!!!! 
While I don’t know how you actually feel, sometimes there are tell-tale signs, and then you act like we are having an affair (ILLICIT) – I GOTTA LEAVE, I CAN’T KEEP DOING THIS WITH YOU!!  LOL!! Anyone watching would think we are actually involved, LOLESTEST!!! 
OK, no more Stalkerish TENDENCIES!!

 

I AM ENDING THIS NOW!!!!!!!

I LO…
BYE
SINCERELY NOT YOURS